These last several days I have been exploring the connection between Perfectionism, Anger, and Procrastination. For me, these three things are like notes in a musical triad that when played, sound dark, sinister, and depressing.
As the days go on, I continue to poke holes in the lie of Perfectionism. I know that Perfectionism, for me, is driven by an irrational fear of failure that causes me to procrastinate when trying to do tasks designed to move me forward toward the “perfect” goal. I put things off to delay feeling the emotional pain that surrounds failure. The act of procrastinating holds my true-self for ransom, and I become the very things I want to avoid: dishonest, fake, and inactive. The fact that I have believed such a lie, one that results in holding myself hostage, fuels my anger.
Perfectionism, now I know your dirty little secret, and I am wise to the game you are playing. My mama didn’t raise no fool.